On the First day of Christmas, James Cameron gave to me...a $500 million movie.

So guess what? You know that post earlier in the week that I put out there about a post-apocalyptic movie I was super psyched to see? Yeah, ignore that one. Chris came to me and said “Matt, I’m already depressed enough because of the holidaze and I don’t want to watch anything that would bring me down even more. So let’s not see ‘The Road’ this week because I am a sniveling man-baby.” While I was just as struck as you are that he would use the term “holidaze” and nothing says holiday cheer to me like the remnants of a ruined society gripped by crushing despair (cause, you know, consumerism), I agreed to postpone that show for our week after Festivus come down show. The fact that “The Road” is still in limited release played some small part in this decision as well but let’s not dwell on that, ‘kay? Kay. So for this weeks show, we will be discussing “Avatar,” James Cameron’s obscenely expensive, ridiculously CGI’d (that means computer cartoons, if you didn’t know) return to sci-fi. Will it be a glorious love letter to genre a la “Aliens” and “Terminator 2” or a make-me-want-to-dig-my-eyeballs-out-of-my-skull ode to nonsense from a once great genre director, like “A.I.”? Oh, Mr. Spielberg, how you hurt me with that one. We’ll also be talking about the Johnny Depp and Christian Bale advertisement for the Thompson sub-machine gun, “Public Enemies.” And in the spirit of the season, The Inventory for this week will be our favorite holiday movies! Hooray for Christmakwanzakah spirit! (SPOILER ALERT: Scalzo’s favorite is “Die Hard.”) The much touted DVD contest WILL HAPPEN so I wasn’t lying about that part because I like to slip some truth into my lies. It keeps you on your toes. BUT WAIT…THERE”S MORE! We’ll also have a special celebrity guest, Christopher “Super-Fan” Esposito. I know you are shocked we could get Espo to associate with us but I will thank you not to ask how we got him to agree. Just listen to the show to make the latest addition to our list of secret shames worthwhile. Later guys, I’m off to practice for the Feats of Strength!